I’ve been wrestling for a while with when we should all eat
the same thing for dinner every night.
This is a somewhat difficult question in our family anyway, since I’m
vegetarian and Lance isn’t; since I’m a “picky” eater, and Lance isn’t; and
since I also tend to be dieting endlessly...but for those nights when the two
adults are, in fact, eating the same thing, should Judith also be “required” to
eat only that?
Sometime last fall, I instigated “family dinner time”
during which we all sit at the table together, and no one leaves until everyone
is finish eating (yes, some dinners get very long as we wait for Judith
to finish!). This began as an attempt
to change our habit of eating dinner in front of the TV every night, but it also
quickly occurred to me that it could be a way to “encourage” Judith to eat what
we eat. That’s easy when we’re having
pita pizzas or grilled cheese or quesadillas.
Even make-your-own salad night works, because I can put together a plate
of the things she likes out of the salad choices (and she’ll eat just about
anything dipped in ranch dressing!). My
dilemma comes on a night like tonight.
Lance and I had beans and rice (a favorite of ours: sautéed mushrooms,
garbanzos, kidney beans, black beans, and canned tomatoes, served over brown
rice and garnished with sour cream or grated cheese). Judith had cheese and crackers and a banana. I’ve never offered her the beans and rice
dish, because I know (assume?) she doesn’t like mushrooms or tomatoes (at least she hasn’t yet). She’s tried a
garbanzo bean once or twice, and not minded it, but not asked for more. So I go the easy route and make her a
separate meal (easy in terms of getting her fed, not easier to make).
And I don’t know if that’s the right thing to do.
At almost-three-and-a-half should she be eating beans
and rice? Should I make the “rule” that
she eats what we eat and there’s no other option? (Then how do I explain that Daddy and Mama don’t eat the same things?) Or do I continue to do what I’m doing: serving her what we’re having when I know
she’ll like it (pushing the boundaries on occasion) and making a separate meal
for her when I know she’ll refuse the adults’ option?
Her “acceptable food” list is pretty varied compared to a
lot of the stories I’ve heard:
lots of
cheese, whole wheat bread, peanut butter, quesadillas, pizza, macaroni and
cheese, just about any fruit, greek-style yogurt, granola, scrambled or
hard-boiled eggs, sautéed or grilled chicken, olives, pickles, tuna fish sandwiches,
pumpkin soup, tomato soup, french fries, ranch dressing...
(And of course, given my semi-profession,
she’s quite adventurous when it comes to dessert. :-)
On the “don’t like” side she includes most meat (which is
pretty understandable given how infrequently we actually have meat in the
house), tomatoes, avocado/guacamole, mushrooms, sharp cheeses... And she will predictably turn up her nose
completely at something she hasn’t had before.
We explain frequently that she can’t say she doesn’t like something if
she hasn’t tasted it, but she’s unlikely to taste anything on the first
try...or even the fifth try. (In fact,
I have really no idea what makes her eventually taste something at all!)
So I know that the nights she gets served something
new she won’t eat dinner. In theory I
know it’s not a horrendous thing for her to miss a meal, but it can be
frustrating to “waste” food getting her to try it, enforce “this is your
dinner,” and know that she’s still hungry!
So this remains a dilemma.
I am thankful that she eats more than one specific food. I am thankful that she is healthy. I am (usually) willing to continue to make
her a separate meal several times a week.
So it’ll probably be a while before I come to a decision.
TTFN,
Barbara
